“I should not have said that.”
“I should not have done that.”
“I can’t wait to get that.”
“I hope that doesn’t happen.”
“I hope that does happen.”
The mind has a tendency to go, and where it goes we have a tendency to follow. We follow the mind into some very sketchy neighborhoods, places where we don’t often feel comfortable. By following a thought we can find ourselves so much under its spell that we believe that it is true. Like a vivid dream; so lifelike it seems real.
Our favorite thing to do is “rehearse” and “rehash”. These are like the greatest hits for the mind. “Oh man, last night at that get together I should have said…” or one of my favorites I hear myself say often is, “My life is going to be great when____ happens”.
Now I’m not saying that we can’t plan life events or learn from our past experience with a bit of reflection. What I’m referring to here is our little self-critic that likes to enter life’s party without an invitation.
There is always a squeaky wheel in our life. It is like that shopping cart that you get and one wheel is screwy. We are always looking at that one thing in life that just isn’t right and once we get that one thing right, it will all be well. (That is if we are lucky; let’s face it, sometimes there is more than one squeaky wheel.)
The reality is – impermanence. Everything is in constant flux, so how could we want something to “be” a certain way? That is impossible. Nothing can be a certain way but if only for a moment.
Even if we get something we want, it would be transitory. What if you landed the “perfect job?” That job is a bunch of moving parts that are constantly changing. The people that you work with, the health of the company, etc. What about the perfect relationship? The person you are with is always changing.
Furthermore we can get attached. Even if a perfect situation comes along we can so easily move right into not wanting it to change – “I want this to stay just like this – I’m happy!”. But it won’t stay the same, nothing does. Fear of losing what we have arises simultaneously when we get what we want.
Whatever the situation may be it is always in flux. Most importantly because YOU are always in flux; day-by-day you are a different human being. Every experience is changing you, sometimes in small ways, sometimes in great ways, but change is constant.
The fix to this however is to discover that the peace you are looking for is already here. Instead of looking for it in the rehearsing and rehashing, look for it in the only place it can be- right here. Turn towards gratitude for the good things that you do have (no matter how harsh things may seem, we can always find something). Smile if you can, your life is happening! You have arrived at your destination; for this moment is the only destination. Even that very something you are waiting for to shift something in your life will arrive in the eternal now, don’t miss it while you are busy thinking about where to find it!
We don’t will our life into certain directions, we accept the abundance that our life is and then see it everywhere. There is nowhere to go but here. The moment is unshakable.